A Short List of Increasingly Ridiculous Things that are Nearly Impossible to do on Crutches

1. walk on snow, ice, and wet floors

2. storm out of an argument

3. take swings at a piñata

4. carry anything

5. quietly back out of awkward conversations

6. do anything gracefully

7. sneak up on someone

8. not roll your eyes when someone asks, "Wha'd ya do? Kick your boyfriend? Ha! Ha!"

9. balance beam

10. ladders